The complete ten-week course, in one printable packet.
This document comes in two parts. Part One — Student Handouts is meant to be
photocopied and handed to the young men, one week per page. Part Two — Instructor Notes is for
the leader: the lesson to teach and how it lands in a thirteen-year-old’s week. Use the Print button above (or
your browser’s Print dialog); each week begins on its own page.
Part One · Student Handouts
For the young men — one week per page.
Week 1 · Student Handout
Noticing Your Life
Journaling · the skill of noticing
What does it mean to be poor in spirit? How will you notice?
Scripture
Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Matthew 5:3 (NIV)
Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. — 2 Corinthians 12:7–10 (NIV)
“Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.” — Psalm 139:23–24 (NIV)
“Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord.” — Lamentations 3:40 (NIV)
“Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves.” — 2 Corinthians 13:5 (NIV)
The Opposite Passion · Pride Hyperēphania
Denying your dependence on God — assuming you are morally and existentially self-sufficient.
Pride is the lie that you’ve got it handled — that you don’t really need anyone. The desert fathers called it the root passion: the one that cannot say ‘I need help.’ ‘Poor in spirit’ is the exact opposite — open, empty hands. Jesus says the Kingdom belongs to that man.
From American History · April 12, 1945 · Harry Truman
Harry Truman had been vice president for eighty-two days and had barely spoken to Roosevelt. Summoned to the White House with no explanation, he ran through the Capitol and drove himself over. Eleanor Roosevelt met him upstairs: ‘Harry, the president is dead.’ He asked what he could do for her. She answered, ‘Is there anything we can do for you? You are the one in trouble now.’
“Therefore give to Your servant an understanding heart to judge Your people… For who is able to judge this great people of Yours?” — 1 Kings 3:9
Why this verse? Truman prayed it himself: four days later he closed his first address to Congress with words he wrote, not his staff — ‘I humbly pray Almighty God, in the words of King Solomon: “Give therefore thy servant an understanding heart to judge thy people.”’
From the Fathers
“Be attentive to yourself, that you may be attentive to God.” — Basil the Great · Homily on “Be Attentive to Yourself” (330–379)
“You have made us for yourself, O Lord, and our heart is restless until it rests in you.” — Augustine of Hippo · Confessions (354–430)
“I saw all the snares of the enemy spread out over the earth, and I groaned and said, ‘Who can pass through these?’ And I heard a voice saying, ‘Humility.’” — Anthony the Great · Sayings of the Desert Fathers (c. 251–356)
“Nearly all the wisdom we possess consists of two parts: the knowledge of God and of ourselves.” — John Calvin · Institutes of the Christian Religion (1509–1564)
“Thank you for becoming small and inferior, so that I do not have to pretend that I am big and superior to anybody.” — Richard Rohr · The Universal Christ (b. 1943)
Talk About It
Where in your life do you act like you’ve got it all together when you really don’t?
What’s the difference between real confidence and pride — between strength and just pretending?
If you took an honest audit of one normal day, what do you think would surprise you most?
Who is one person you could actually say ‘I need help with this’ to this week?
The Practice of the Week · The Honest Audit
Each night this week, take five quiet minutes and write a few honest bullet points: where did my hours go today? Where did my attention go when nothing was required of me? No essays, no editing, no judging — just the truth in plain ink.
At the same time each night, open your journal.
Write three to five bullet points: where your time and attention actually went.
Underline one thing that doesn’t match what you say matters most.
Leave it. Don’t fix it yet. Just notice.
Each day: One line before sleep: Today I noticed…
May you have the courage to look, and the grace to be unashamed of what you see.
Week 2 · Student Handout
Prayer & the Examen
Prayer · the skill of the prayer of examen
What does it mean to mourn rather than numb out? What will you find when you look back over your day?
Scripture
I remember my affliction and my wandering, the bitterness and the gall. I well remember them, and my soul is downcast within me. Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.” The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord. — Lamentations 3:19–26 (NIV)
Historical Background
Traditionally attributed to Jeremiah, Lamentations is anonymous poetry for Judah’s grieving community after Babylon destroyed Jerusalem and its Temple in 587/586 BC. In 3:19–26, a suffering voice recalls God’s mercy amid real loss, inviting honest lament and patient hope.
Medieval Christians chanted Lamentations in Holy Week to contemplate Christ’s suffering. Calvin stressed God’s unexhausted mercy; Christians still read the book during Holy Week. In the Examen, we too can bring both pain and remembered mercy to God.
Talk: Imagine your friends leave you out of something and it bothers you all day. What could you say to God about it when you look back over your day?
The Opposite Passion · Acedia Akēdia
Spiritual numbness and listlessness — a frantic escape from the reality of the present moment.
Acedia is the desert word for that restless, two-o’clock feeling — bored, can’t sit still, want to be anywhere but here — so you reach for the phone. The monks called it the noonday demon: ‘this is pointless, go do something else.’ Mourning is its exact opposite: stay present to what you feel, and be comforted.
Talk: When you get that restless ‘I need to be doing something else’ feeling, what do you usually reach for?
From American History · September 6–14, 1901 · William McKinley
William and Ida McKinley had lost both their young daughters, and he helped care for Ida through her seizures. On September 6, 1901, an assassin shot the president at a fair in Buffalo. Doctors hoped he would recover, but he died eight days later. Reports of his dying words express trust in God: ‘It is God’s way. His will, not ours, be done.’
“Nevertheless not My will, but Yours, be done.” — Luke 22:42
Why this verse? Accounts differ in their exact wording. McKinley’s reported words echo Jesus’ trust in Luke 22:42, but do not establish that he was quoting Luke. In prayer, we too can name what hurts and ask God for help.
Talk: McKinley’s words were about trusting God with what he couldn’t control. Before a big test or game, what’s one thing a guy could put in God’s hands?
From the Fathers
“Prayer is the laying aside of thoughts.” — Evagrius Ponticus · On Prayer (345–399)
“The time of business does not differ with me from the time of prayer; in the noise and clutter of my kitchen… I possess God in as great tranquillity as if I were upon my knees.” — Brother Lawrence · The Practice of the Presence of God (c. 1614–1691)
“In all that happens, my one desire and my one joy should be to know: ‘Here is the thing that God has willed for me. In this His love is found.’” — Thomas Merton · New Seeds of Contemplation (1915–1968)
Talk: Brother Lawrence prayed while working in the kitchen. What’s one ordinary part of your day where you could talk to God?
The Practice of the Week · The Daily Examen: PRAY
At day’s end, walk back through your day with God: Pause, Reflect, Ask, Yield. Take ten minutes, or start smaller.
PAUSE — Set distractions aside. Breathe slowly: ‘God, I’m here.’
REFLECT — Remember one good moment and thank God. Notice one hard moment and name the feeling.
ASK — Ask God for help, forgiveness, or courage for your next step.
YIELD — Let God lead. Place tomorrow and what you can’t control in his hands: ‘God, I trust you.’
Each day: Short on time? Take one breath, remember one moment, ask for help, and say, ‘God, I trust you.’
May you stop running from your own day long enough to find God already in it.
Week 3 · Student Handout
It Seemed Good
A shared review of the Book of Acts
The group decided to read the Book of Acts on their own, then come back together to discuss what they noticed, what they will carry into daily life, and how the disciples and apostles made decisions.
Overview of the Book of Acts
Acts continues the story told in Luke’s Gospel: the risen Jesus commissions his
witnesses, the Holy Spirit empowers them, and the good news moves from Jerusalem toward
the nations. Acts 1:8 gives the broad geography: Jerusalem, Judea and Samaria, and the ends
of the earth. Peter is prominent early; Paul becomes central later. The story includes
sermons, conversions, shared life, conflict, journeys, and trials.
Classifying and Categorizing the Chapters
Chapters
Movement
What happens
1–2
Beginning & empowerment
Ascension, Matthias, Pentecost, Peter’s sermon, and the first community.
3–7
Witness in Jerusalem
Healing, preaching, opposition, generosity, Ananias and Sapphira, the Seven, and Stephen’s death.
8–12
Crossing boundaries
Samaria, the Ethiopian, Saul’s conversion, Cornelius, Antioch, and Peter’s rescue.
13–14
Mission & new churches
Antioch sends Barnabas and Paul; they preach, endure opposition, and appoint elders.
15
Discernment & disagreement
The Jerusalem Council addresses Gentile belonging; Paul and Barnabas then part over Mark.
16–20
Widening mission & pastoral care
Macedonia, Philippi, Athens, Corinth, Ephesus, and Paul’s farewell to the elders.
21–26
Arrest & public testimony
Paul’s arrest in Jerusalem, defenses before rulers, and appeal to Caesar.
27–28
Witness reaches Rome
Storm, shipwreck, Malta, and proclamation in Rome while Paul remains under guard.
These groupings are a reading aid. Acts ends with the gospel still being proclaimed;
it does not narrate the end of Paul’s life or the completion of the church’s mission.
Key Theological Points
Historical readings of Acts: brief quotations in English translation, followed by their connection to the text.
One God keeps his promises · Acts 2:22–36; 3:13–26
“the promise which God made to the fathers had been fulfilled by Jesus”
The church’s widening fellowship begins with God’s initiative. The community must recognize those God has welcomed.
Discussion Questions
Discussion Question #1
What stood out to you as you read Acts?
Discussion Question #2
What will you carry from your reading into daily life?
Discussion Question #3
How did the disciples and apostles discern what to do?
Read these scenes alongside It Seemed Good — How the Apostles Made Decisions,
which frames this discussion. Compare the reasons people give, who participates, and how they respond when the next step is unclear.
Scripture, qualifications, prayer, and a lot · Acts 1:15–26
show which one of these two you have chosenActs 1:24.
Peter reads the Psalms; the community identifies qualified witnesses and nominates two, then prays and casts lots. They do not choose from an unlimited field at random. This occurs before Pentecost; Acts records no later use of lots.
A practical need and the community’s judgment · Acts 6:1–6
men of good report, full of the Holy Spirit and of wisdomActs 6:3.
Neglected widows prompt a response. The Twelve state the work and qualifications; the disciples choose the Seven; the apostles pray and lay hands on them. Luke reports no revealed list of names. Character and competence matter.
Direct guidance, followed by understanding · Acts 8:26–40; 9:10–19; 10–11
Go near, and join yourself to this chariot.Acts 8:29.
Philip follows an angel’s instruction and the Spirit’s word. Ananias voices his fear about Saul before obeying. Peter ponders his vision, meets Cornelius, sees the Spirit given, and explains the events to the church. Receiving guidance does not eliminate questions, interpretation, or accountability.
Worship, fasting, prayer, and commissioning · Acts 13:1–4; 14:21–23
Separate Barnabas and Saul for meActs 13:2.
The Spirit speaks as Antioch’s prophets and teachers worship and fast. They pray, fast again, lay on hands, and send. Later, elders are appointed with prayer and fasting without a reported vision. Acts includes both explicit direction and deliberate appointment.
Debate, testimony, Scripture, and shared judgment · Acts 15:1–35
For it seemed good to the Holy Spirit, and to usActs 15:28.
The council hears the circumcision dispute. Peter recalls God’s gift to Gentiles; Barnabas and Paul report the mission; James reads the evidence alongside Amos and offers a judgment. The apostles, elders, and whole church choose messengers and send a letter. Their conclusion follows real deliberation; it does not bypass it.
Planning, redirection, and a conclusion reached together · Acts 16:1–10
concluding that the Lord had called us to preach the Good News to themActs 16:10.
Paul selects the well-regarded Timothy. The team tries routes that the Spirit blocks. After Paul’s Macedonian vision, the group concludes where to go. Luke names the Spirit as the source of the prohibitions but does not tell us how they experienced them. This passage cannot establish one universal test of guidance.
I will return again to you if God wills.Acts 18:21.
Paul plans travel, adjusts a route because of a plot, and considers timing. In the storm, a divine promise of survival still leaves sailors needing to stay aboard and everyone needing food. Trust in providence includes practical action; they do not wait for an oracle about every logistical choice.
Disagreement without a narrated winner · Acts 15:36–41
the contention grew so sharp that they separated from each otherActs 15:39.
Barnabas wants to take Mark; Paul judges that unwise after Mark’s earlier departure. They form separate teams. Luke does not report a revelation settling the dispute or declare either man right. The council’s agreement does not mean believers will always reach unanimity.
The hard case: Paul’s journey to Jerusalem · Acts 20–21
Paul says he goes bound by the Spirit (20:22). Yet the disciples at Tyre say
through the Spirit that he should not go up to Jerusalem (21:4). Agabus predicts
imprisonment; Paul’s companions plead with him to stay; he continues, and they finally say,
The Lord’s will be done. (21:14).
Chrysostom, Homily 45 on Acts,
understands the warning as revealed danger and the plea to stay as the disciples’ application.
Another reading takes 21:4 as a prohibition Paul resisted. Luke does not explicitly pronounce
Paul’s journey sinful; the Lord later confirms his witness in Rome (23:11). Keep the textual
tension visible: a warning, its interpretation, and the action it calls for are not always the same thing.
Bring it into the room: Choose one scene and name what the people knew,
what they had to judge, and what remained uncertain. Then consider a real decision in your life:
what might prayer, Scripture, wise counsel, character, and practical responsibility contribute?
Week 4 · Student Handout
Fasting
Fasting · the skill of consolation & desolation
What does it mean to hunger and thirst for righteousness? What happens when you stop feeding everything else?
Scripture
Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be filled.
Matthew 5:6
“Jesus was led up by the Spirit into the wilderness… and when he had fasted forty days and forty nights, he was hungry.” — Matthew 4:1–2
“As the deer pants for the water brooks, so my soul pants after you, God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.” — Psalm 42:1–2
“I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will not be hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty.” — John 6:35
“Walk by the Spirit, and you won’t fulfill the lust of the flesh.” — Galatians 5:16
The Opposite Passion · Gluttony Gastrimargia
The anxious urge to overconsume and hoard — to secure yourself by feeding yourself.
Gluttony is not only about food. The desert fathers saw it as the reflex to soothe every discomfort by consuming something: snacks, screens, more, now. Fasting is the direct attack — you feel the craving, you do not obey it, and you do not die. ‘Hunger and thirst for righteousness’ aims that same engine at God: ‘they shall be filled.’
From American History · July 20, 1620 · The Pilgrims
Before the Mayflower sailed, pastor John Robinson called his congregation to a day of fasting and prayer to seek direction. They had reason to be afraid: of the thirty-six hundred settlers sent to Jamestown between 1619 and 1622, three thousand died. They fasted first — not to earn an answer, but to find out what they actually wanted.
“Then I proclaimed a fast there at the river of Ahava, that we might humble ourselves before our God, to seek from Him the right way for us.” — Ezra 8:21
Why this verse? It was the sermon text. Before the Pilgrims sailed, John Robinson proclaimed ‘a day of solemn humiliation’ and preached Ezra 8:21 — a fast at the river Ahava before a dangerous road home.
From the Fathers
“Fasting is the support of our soul; it gives us wings to mount up high.” — John Chrysostom · Homilies on Fasting (c. 347–407)
“Resist the beginnings; the remedy comes too late when the evil has gained strength by long delay.” — Thomas à Kempis · The Imitation of Christ (1380–1471)
“If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world.” — C. S. Lewis · Mere Christianity (1898–1963)
“More than any other Discipline, fasting reveals the things that control us.” — Richard Foster · Celebration of Discipline (b. 1942)
“Do not look for pleasure, but turn away from the things that satisfy your senses and your mind, and look for God in hunger and thirst and darkness, through the deserts of the spirit.” — Thomas Merton · New Seeds of Contemplation (1915–1968)
Talk About It
What’s one craving that feels like it runs you — that you obey the second you feel it?
Most things you really want never actually satisfy you. Why do you think that is?
When have you done something ‘fun’ that left you emptier afterward, like Ignatius’s daydreams?
What’s one thing you could fast from for a few days — and what might that teach you?
The Practice of the Week · Fast From One Thing
Choose one thing to fast from this week — a game, social media, sweets, or a meal if that is wise for you. When the craving hits, do not obey it: breathe, and pray one line — ‘Jesus, I’m hungrier for you than for this.’
Pick ONE thing to fast from — real, but doable.
When the craving hits: breathe, and pray one line.
Notice what the wanting is really about.
Each night, name one consolation and one desolation.
Each day: A growl, a craving, a reach for the phone — let each one become a tiny prayer: “I am hungrier for you.”
May your hungers stop ruling you, and may they all begin to point you home.
Week 5 · Student Handout
Generosity
Generosity · the skill of gratitude
What does it mean to be merciful? What will you open your hands and let go of?
Scripture
Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy.
Matthew 5:7
“It is more blessed to give than to receive.” — Acts 20:35
“Let each man give as he has decided in his heart, not grudgingly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.” — 2 Corinthians 9:7
“Give, and it will be given to you… For with the measure you measure, it will be measured back to you.” — Luke 6:38
“In everything give thanks, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus toward you.” — 1 Thessalonians 5:18
The Opposite Passion · Avarice Philargyria
Grasping for wealth and security out of a fear of future scarcity, unwilling to depend on anyone.
Avarice is the clenched fist — grabbing and holding because deep down you are afraid there will not be enough. The desert fathers saw it as fear wearing the mask of wisdom (‘I’m just being smart’). ‘Blessed are the merciful’ is the open hand: letting go of debts, giving without protecting yourself. Avarice says grab; mercy says release — and only an open hand can give or receive.
From American History · 1911 · John Wanamaker
As a boy, John Wanamaker wrote on a sheet of brown paper every single thing he wanted to be: minister, architect, merchant, journalist, doctor. It came down to merchant or minister — and he became both, running the largest department store in the world and the biggest Sunday school in the country, with a soup kitchen and a job bureau attached. Wanting was never his problem. Order was.
“But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.” — Matthew 6:33
Why this verse? Wanamaker named it as the decision that ordered everything else: ‘Forty-five years ago I decided that God’s promise was sure: “Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.”’
From the Fathers
“I would maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought; and that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder.” — G. K. Chesterton · A Short History of England (1874–1936)
“The bread which you hold back belongs to the hungry; the coat in your closet, to the naked; the shoes you let rot, to the barefoot.” — Basil the Great · Homily on “I Will Tear Down My Barns” (330–379)
“You are not making a gift of what is yours to the poor man, but you are giving him back what is his.” — Ambrose of Milan · On Naboth (c. 340–397)
“In ordinary life we hardly realize that we receive a great deal more than we give, and that it is only with gratitude that life becomes rich.” — Dietrich Bonhoeffer · Letters and Papers from Prison (1906–1945)
“If you have money, consider that perhaps the only reason God allowed it to fall into your hands was so that you might find joy and perfection by giving it all away.” — Thomas Merton · New Seeds of Contemplation (1915–1968)
Talk About It
What makes it hard to be generous — to give money, time, or credit away?
When has someone shown you mercy — gone easy on you when they didn’t have to?
Scarcity says ‘never enough’; gratitude says ‘look how much I’ve been given.’ Which runs your head most days?
Who in your life needs mercy from you right now?
The Practice of the Week · Open Hands
Two things. Do one concrete generous or merciful act this week — give something away, give your time, or go easy on someone who wronged you. And every day, write down three specific things you are grateful for, no repeats. By day three it gets hard; that is the muscle growing.
Choose one act of generosity or mercy for the week.
Make it concrete and do it — don’t just intend it.
Each day, write three specific gratitudes (no repeats).
Notice what open hands feel like versus clenched ones.
Each day: Three specific thank-yous, written down, every day. Push past the obvious ones.
May your hands stay open, and may the mercy you give find its way back to you.
Week 6 · Student Handout
Silence & Solitude
Silence & Solitude · the skill of stillness & the breath
What does it mean to be pure in heart — undivided? What will you hear when you go quiet?
Scripture
Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.
Matthew 5:8
“Be still, and know that I am God.” — Psalm 46:10
“The Lord was not in the wind… not in the earthquake… not in the fire. After the fire, there was a still, small voice.” — 1 Kings 19:11–12
“Early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus rose up and went out to a solitary place, and there he prayed.” — Mark 1:35
“Surely I have stilled and quieted my soul, like a weaned child with his mother.” — Psalm 131:2
The Opposite Passion · Lust & Impurity Porneia
Reducing people, things, even God into objects to feed an immediate craving.
Porneia is bigger than the obvious: any way we turn a person or a thing into something to consume for a quick hit. The phone in your pocket is engineered for exactly that. ‘Pure in heart’ means undivided — a single, clean gaze — and silence is how you begin to un-split a heart a thousand feeds have fractured. The reward is staggering: the undivided heart ‘shall see God.’
From American History · Christmas Eve, 1968 · Apollo 8
Apollo 8 was the first crew ever to leave Earth’s orbit. Experts gave it even odds, and Frank Borman’s wife had already written his eulogy. Watching the earth shrink behind him, Borman thought, ‘This must be what God sees.’ Bill Anders found that once you could no longer pick out countries, you started seeing something else — how small it is, how close we all are. From lunar orbit, they read Genesis aloud to the largest audience in the history of television.
“In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.” — Genesis 1:1
Why this verse? The crew read it aloud from lunar orbit — three men passing around a fireproof copy of Genesis 1, reading verses 1–10 in turn to roughly a billion people. Nobody at Mission Control knew in advance what they would say.
From the Fathers
“Purity of heart is to will one thing.” — Søren Kierkegaard · Upbuilding Discourses in Various Spirits (1813–1855)
“Solitude is the furnace of transformation.” — Henri Nouwen · The Way of the Heart (1932–1996)
“Go, sit in your cell, and your cell will teach you everything.” — Abba Moses · Sayings of the Desert Fathers (4th century)
“In silence and quietness the devout soul makes progress and learns the hidden things of the Scriptures.” — Thomas à Kempis · The Imitation of Christ (1380–1471)
“The truest solitude is not something outside you, not an absence of men or of sound around you; it is an abyss opening up in the center of your own soul.” — Thomas Merton · New Seeds of Contemplation (1915–1968)
Talk About It
What in your life is designed so you’re never bored or quiet? What is that doing to you?
What does it mean for your heart to be ‘split’ in a lot of directions instead of single?
When you got quiet this week, what ‘weather’ rolled in?
Where could you put two minutes of real silence into a normal day?
The Practice of the Week · Two Minutes on the Mountain
Once a day, put the phone in another room. Sit up straight. Take five slow breaths from your belly — hand on your stomach, feel it rise. Then sit in silence for two minutes. Thoughts will pour in immediately. That’s not failing — that’s the practice. Each time you notice you’ve drifted, take a breath and come back. You are the mountain; the thoughts are only weather.
Phone in another room. Sit upright, feet on the floor.
Five slow belly breaths — in through the nose, out through the mouth.
Two minutes of silence. Let thoughts come and pass.
When you drift, breathe once and return. Don’t judge the drift.
Each day: Through the day, one deep breath with a single word on the exhale: “Rest.”
May your heart grow single, and may the quiet you find begin to show you God.
Week 7 · Student Handout
Community
Community · the skill of doing this together
What does it mean to make peace instead of just keeping it? Who do you need to talk to this week?
Scripture
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called children of God.
Matthew 5:9
“Two are better than one… For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow; but woe to him who is alone when he falls.” — Ecclesiastes 4:9–10
“Iron sharpens iron; so a man sharpens his friend’s countenance.” — Proverbs 27:17
“If it is possible, as much as it is up to you, be at peace with all men.” — Romans 12:18
“Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.” — John 15:13
The Opposite Passion · Envy Zēlos
Seeing life as a zero-sum game, where someone else’s win is your loss.
Envy is the quiet poison of comparison — the feeling that another guy’s win is somehow your loss. It cannot celebrate anyone, because it is always keeping score, and it destroys brotherhood faster than anything: you cannot be a real friend to someone you are secretly competing with. ‘Blessed are the peacemakers’ is the cure — a peacemaker actively wants the other guy to flourish.
From American History · July 4, 1826 · Adams, Jefferson & Benjamin Rush
John Adams and Thomas Jefferson met as friends in 1775 and ruined each other in the election of 1800 — Adams would not even stay for the inauguration. They were enemies for over a decade. Their mutual friend Benjamin Rush dreamed the two of them reconciled, wrote to both about the dream, and would not let it go until they wrote to each other again. They died on the same day.
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.” — Matthew 5:9
Why this verse? Be careful with this one: nothing in the record has Rush quoting Matthew 5:9. The story is true and the fit is real, but the Beatitude is the book’s reading of the story, not Rush’s own words.
From the Fathers
“Let him who cannot be alone beware of community. Let him who is not in community beware of being alone.” — Dietrich Bonhoeffer · Life Together (1906–1945)
“We are not at peace with others because we are not at peace with ourselves, and we are not at peace with ourselves because we are not at peace with God.” — Thomas Merton · New Seeds of Contemplation (1915–1968)
“Here we are, you and I, and I hope a third, Christ, in our midst.” — Aelred of Rievaulx · Spiritual Friendship (1110–1167)
“If you live alone, whose feet will you wash?” — Basil the Great · The Longer Rules (330–379)
“People who know nothing of God, and whose lives are centered on themselves, imagine they can only find themselves by asserting their own desires and ambitions and appetites in a struggle with the rest of the world.” — Thomas Merton · New Seeds of Contemplation (1915–1968)
Talk About It
Whose life do you find yourself comparing yourself to — and what does it do to you?
Can you actually be glad when someone you compete with wins? Why is that so hard?
Who actually knows the real you? How many people is that?
Is there a low-grade conflict you could take one step to repair this week?
The Practice of the Week · One Real Conversation
Two small things this week. First: have one genuinely real conversation — ask a friend or family member how they’re actually doing, and answer honestly yourself when they ask you. No performing. Second: think of someone you’re in a low-grade conflict with — a friend, a sibling, a parent — and take one step toward peace. A text, an apology, sitting next to them. Small. Real.
Pick one person and have one honest conversation this week.
When they ask how you are, tell the truth.
Name one person you’re at odds with.
Take one concrete step toward peace with them.
Each day: Once a day, ask someone ‘how are you, really?’ — and actually listen to the answer.
May you be a man who is truly known, and a maker of peace wherever you go.
Week 8 · Student Handout
Service & Witness
Service & Witness · the skill of joining what god is doing
What does it mean to be blessed when doing right costs you? Where will you serve when no one is watching?
Scripture
Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven.
Matthew 5:10
“Whoever wants to become great among you shall be your servant… For the Son of Man also came not to be served, but to serve.” — Mark 10:43–45
“He has shown you, O man, what is good. What does the Lord require of you, but to act justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God?” — Micah 6:8
“Always be ready to give an answer to everyone who asks you a reason concerning the hope that is in you, yet with humility and respect.” — 1 Peter 3:15
“Let us not be weary in doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we don’t give up.” — Galatians 6:9
The Opposite Passion · Sadness & Despair Lypē
A paralyzing dejection from a closed, earthbound view fixed on failure and loss.
Lypē is the heavy, sinking sadness that says ‘what’s the point’ — grief curled in on itself, with no window to heaven. It is the enemy of service: a man crushed by despair has nothing to give and no courage to stand. ‘Blessed are those persecuted for righteousness’ is the opposite — hope anchored in the Kingdom, not in your circumstances. Courage is what hope produces.
From American History · February 3, 1943 · The Four Chaplains
At 12:55 a.m. a torpedo hit the troopship Dorchester among the icebergs off Greenland. Four chaplains aboard — a Methodist, a Jewish rabbi, a Dutch Reformed minister, and a Catholic priest — handed out life jackets in the dark, and when the jackets ran out they took off their own and gave them away. Survivors last saw the four of them arm in arm on the slanting deck.
“Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends.” — John 15:13
Why this verse? Truman applied it to them by name, dedicating the Chapel of the Four Chaplains eight years to the day after the sinking: ‘They really lived up to the moral standard that declares, “Greater love hath no man than this…”’
From the Fathers
“The blood of the martyrs is the seed of the Church.” — Tertullian · Apology (c. 155–220)
“Eighty-six years I have served Him, and He never did me any wrong. How then can I blaspheme my King who saved me?” — Polycarp of Smyrna · The Martyrdom of Polycarp (c. 69–155)
“When Christ calls a man, he bids him come and die.” — Dietrich Bonhoeffer · The Cost of Discipleship (1906–1945)
“In the evening of life, we will be examined in love.” — John of the Cross · Sayings of Light and Love (1542–1591)
“You never play the victim or call for any vengeance, but only breathe a universal forgiveness upon the world from this crucified place — your upside-down throne.” — Richard Rohr · The Universal Christ (b. 1943)
Talk About It
When something feels pointless or hopeless, what happens to your willingness to do hard or good things?
What’s something you believe that’s socially expensive to admit? What makes it scary?
Where do you already see someone around you hurting or in need?
What’s one act of service you could do this week that nobody finds out about?
The Practice of the Week · Hidden Service, Quiet Courage
Two things, both requiring courage. Do one act of service nobody finds out about — help someone who cannot pay you back and will not know it was you. Then take one small step of witness: stand for something, invite someone, be openly kind in a way that might cost you. Notice what it costs.
Find one person who’s hurting or in need around you.
Serve them in a way that stays hidden.
Take one small step of standing for what’s right.
Afterward, name what it cost — and what it was like.
Each day: Ask each morning: where is God already at work near me today, and how can I join him?
May you serve where no one sees, and stand where it counts, because your hope cannot be taken from you.
Week 9 · Student Handout
Scripture
Scripture · the skill of meditating on the word
What does it mean to love God with everything, and your neighbor as yourself? What one line will you carry all week?
Scripture
You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the first and great commandment.
And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.
Matthew 22:37–39
“Hear, O Israel: the Lord our God, the Lord is one. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your might.” — Deuteronomy 6:4–5
“You shall love your neighbor as yourself. I am the Lord.” — Leviticus 19:18
“On these two commandments depend the whole law and the prophets.” — Matthew 22:40
“A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples.” — John 13:34–35
The Opposite Passion · Vainglory Kenodoxia
Craving to be seen, praised, and admired — turning even love into a performance.
Vainglory is the sneaky twin of pride: doing the right thing so that people will see. It is the spirit of the feed — performing your life for an audience. Hold it against the Great Commandment and you feel the war: vainglory loves the image of itself more than God or anyone else. To take in Scripture in secret, and to love when no one is watching, is its exact opposite.
From American History · 1917 · The Book in the Trenches
The First World War killed some ten million soldiers, and one shell in four on the western front carried gas. Bible societies gave out more than nine million copies of Scripture in eighty languages — to troops and prisoners on every side of the war. Men carried them into the trenches in their coat pockets. Nobody did that for extra credit.
“Holding fast the word of life, so that I may rejoice in the day of Christ.” — Philippians 2:16
Why this verse? Partly the book’s attribution. Wilson’s foreword to the soldiers’ pocket Bibles gave the book a title — ‘The Bible is the word of life’ — which the author traces here. Wilson cited no verse, and the same phrase appears in 1 John 1:1.
From the Fathers
“Ignorance of the Scriptures is ignorance of Christ.” — Jerome · Commentary on Isaiah (c. 347–420)
“The Scriptures are the swaddling clothes and the manger in which Christ lies.” — Martin Luther · Preface to the Old Testament (1483–1546)
“Scripture is like a river… in which the lamb may wade and the elephant may swim.” — Gregory the Great · Morals on the Book of Job (c. 540–604)
“Everywhere I have sought rest and found it nowhere, except in a corner with a book.” — Thomas à Kempis · his personal motto (1380–1471)
“The man who is fully content with conceptual knowledge of God, and does not burn to possess Him by love, has never really known Him.” — Thomas Merton (1915–1968)
Talk About It
What do you do differently when you know people are watching versus when you’re alone?
Jesus says the whole Bible hangs on two things — loving God and loving people. Why do you think he sums all of it up in love?
What are you ‘feeding your mind’ the most right now? What is it making you want?
Which is harder for you right now — loving God with everything, or loving the people right around you? Why?
The Practice of the Week · One Line, Four Times
Take the Great Commandment above and meditate on one phrase a day, following the four steps below. The monks called this lectio divina: you are not getting through it, you are letting it get into you.
READ — say the phrase out loud, slowly.
REFLECT — which word snags you? Sit on it.
RESPOND — tell God why it stuck.
REST — read once more; be quiet with it.
Each day: On ‘your neighbor as yourself’ day, carry the phrase and look for one real chance to live it.
May the Word you take in when no one is watching make you a man who loves when no one is watching.
Week 10 · Student Handout
Integration
A Rule of Life · the skill of spiritual location
What does it mean to be salt and light? Who are you becoming — and what will you actually keep?
Scripture
You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill can’t be hidden… let your light shine before men.
Matthew 5:14–16
“Blessed are you when people… persecute you for my sake. Rejoice, and be exceedingly glad, for great is your reward in heaven.” — Matthew 5:11–12
“You are the salt of the earth.” — Matthew 5:13
“Remain in me, and I in you… As the branch can’t bear fruit by itself unless it remains in the vine, neither can you, unless you remain in me. Apart from me you can do nothing.” — John 15:4–5
“Jesus asked him, ‘What do you want me to do for you?’” — Mark 10:51
The Opposite Passion · The Eight, Gathered Hō Ogdoē Hēmera · The Eighth Day
Not one passion now, but all of them — and the practices that stand guard.
Seven is the number of the finished world; eight is the new creation breaking in — the day of resurrection. It is no accident that Evagrius named eight thoughts and Jesus spoke eight Beatitudes. A Rule of Life is not about beating them by willpower; it is about keeping the practices that keep you connected to the Vine.
From American History · April 8, 1630 · John Winthrop
Sailing with seven hundred Puritans toward a country that did not yet exist, Winthrop preached ‘A Model of Christian Charity.’ Presidents have quoted its most famous line for four hundred years. What Winthrop actually said was not about greatness: ‘We must be knit together in this work as one man… We must delight in each other; make others’ conditions our own; rejoice together, mourn together, labor and suffer together.’
“You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden.” — Matthew 5:14
Why this verse? Winthrop borrowed it on purpose. ‘A Model of Christian Charity’ builds to the line itself: ‘For we must consider that we shall be a City upon a Hill. The eyes of all people are upon us.’
From the Fathers
“Listen carefully, my son, to the master’s instructions, and incline the ear of your heart.” — Benedict of Nursia · The Rule of St. Benedict, Prologue (c. 480–547)
“The glory of God is a living man, and the life of man is the vision of God.” — Irenaeus of Lyons · Against Heresies (c. 130–202)
“To live is to change, and to be perfect is to have changed often.” — John Henry Newman · An Essay on the Development of Christian Doctrine (1801–1890)
“Let nothing disturb you; let nothing frighten you. All things are passing. God alone suffices.” — Teresa of Ávila · Bookmark Prayer (1515–1582)
“Our vocation is not simply to be, but to work together with God in the creation of our own life, our own identity, our own destiny. We are free beings and sons of God.” — Thomas Merton · New Seeds of Contemplation (1915–1968)
Talk About It
Looking back over the eight passions, which one is most at work in you right now?
Which Beatitude do you most want to be true of you a year from now?
Compared to week one, what’s actually different about how you see your life now?
If Jesus asked you, ‘What do you want me to do for you?’ — what would you say today?
The Practice of the Week · Write Your Rule of Life
Build a Rule of Life — your ‘operating system,’ small enough that you will actually keep it: one daily practice, one weekly practice, and one way to stay in community. Write it down and start living it this week.
Name where you are with God right now, honestly.
Choose ONE daily practice you’ll actually keep.
Choose ONE weekly practice.
Choose ONE way to stay in community — name the person.
Begin this week. Then celebrate the journey together.
Each day: Live your Rule, starting now. When you miss a day, just begin again the next — that’s the practice, not the failure.
You are salt; you are light. Go and become, by grace, what God already is by nature — and do not hide it.
Part Two · Instructor Notes
For the leader — the teaching and the facilitator’s recap.
Week 1 · Instructor Notes
Noticing Your Life
Journaling · Noticing
What does it mean to be poor in spirit? How will you notice?
The Lesson · The Practice & The Skill
Before you can change anything, you have to see it clearly. Week one isn’t about fixing your life — it’s about taking an honest look at it. No shame, no judgment, just a real snapshot of how you actually spend your time, your attention, and your energy.
There’s a story worth telling: a man stuck in a season of overwork — a workaholic who knew it — was outside one freezing morning splitting firewood, praying about how stuck he felt. A neighbor yelled across the street, ‘You’re working too hard.’ Then he walked over, set a bigger axe down, looked the man in the eye, said it a third time, and left. The man’s read on it: God sees me. God knows me. God is right here in the middle of it. But he could only hear it because he’d been paying attention to his life.
The practice this week is the simplest in the whole course: noticing, supported by a few minutes of daily journaling. Take an ‘audit’ of your life — where do your hours and your attention actually go, and do they match what you say matters? Most of us resist this, because there’s usually a gap between the life we want and the life we’re living. This week we don’t close the gap. We just measure it.
For Your Life Today
Thirteen is the age of the curated self. Every young man your guys know is running a highlight reel — the feed, the story, the version of himself he shows at school. This week teaches the one skill underneath everything else in the course: telling the truth about your own life, first to yourself and then to God.
To a teenager, ‘poor in spirit’ can sound like losing. Help them see it’s the opposite. The kid who can admit ‘I don’t know’ or ‘I need help’ is the one who actually grows. Pride keeps a boy stuck. Keep this week shame-free and curious — and lead by sharing your own gap first.
Why This Verse · 1 Kings 3:9
Documented — Truman prayed it himself
Truman did not merely fit the verse; he prayed it aloud. Four days after Roosevelt died, in his first address to a joint session of Congress (April 16, 1945), he closed with words he wrote himself — his staff had drafted the rest of the speech:
‘At this moment, I have in my heart a prayer. As I have assumed my heavy duties, I humbly pray Almighty God, in the words of King Solomon: “Give therefore thy servant an understanding heart to judge thy people, that I may discern between good and bad; for who is able to judge this thy so great a people.” I ask only to be a good and faithful servant of my Lord and my people.’
That morning he had told his old Senate colleagues, ‘if you ever pray, pray for me now… I felt like the moon, the stars, and all the planets had fallen on me.’ The verse is his own description of his situation.
Leading the Discussion
Where in your life do you act like you’ve got it all together when you really don’t?
What’s the difference between real confidence and pride — between strength and just pretending?
If you took an honest audit of one normal day, what do you think would surprise you most?
Who is one person you could actually say ‘I need help with this’ to this week?
Week 2 · Instructor Notes
Prayer & the Examen
Prayer · The Prayer of Examen
What does it mean to mourn rather than numb out? What will you find when you look back over your day?
The Lesson · The Practice & The Skill
Most of us run a whole day on autopilot. Something goes badly at nine a.m. — we don’t deal with it, we just carry it — and it bleeds into the next thing, and the next. The Examen is the off-switch for autopilot: an ancient daily prayer that walks back through your day with God.
Remember four steps: PRAY — Pause, Reflect, Ask, Yield.
Pause: Put distractions aside, take a slow breath, and remember that God is with you. ‘God, I’m here.’
Reflect: Walk back through your day. Notice one good moment and thank God for it. Notice one hard moment and name what you felt.
Ask: Talk to God about what you noticed. Ask for help, forgiveness, or courage for a next step. ‘Help me make things right with my friend.’
Yield: Place tomorrow and what you cannot control in God’s hands. Yield means letting God lead you. ‘God, I trust you. Help me follow you tomorrow.’
Why ‘mourn’? Because the Examen makes you honest about the hard parts too — the day that flopped, the way you blew it. Jesus doesn’t bless the man who pretends he’s fine; he blesses the one who lets himself feel it, and gets comforted. You can’t be comforted for a wound you won’t admit.
For Your Life Today
Guys get handed about three acceptable emotions: fine, fired-up, and angry. Everything else gets stuffed. The Examen gives them words for what’s underneath — I was actually anxious about that test; I was actually hurt when they left me out. Naming it is the first step to it not running the day from the shadows.
The hardest steps for teens are specific gratitude (push them past ‘thanks for today’ to one real moment) and honest reflection. Acedia, in their world, looks like the bottomless scroll and quitting on anything hard. The Examen is the small daily rep that trains the opposite.
Why This Verse · Luke 22:42
Reported dying words; a biblical echo, not a verified quotation of Luke
The Abbeville Press and Banner of October 2, 1901, attributes a record of McKinley’s last conscious words to Dr. Matthew Mann: ‘It is God’s way. His will be done, not ours.’ Other accounts vary in wording. This supports a report of trust in God near death, but does not establish an intentional quotation of Luke 22:42. Present the connection to Luke as our comparison. Similar language also appears in the Lord’s Prayer. Source: the 1901 newspaper report.
Take turns reading Scripture, the Opposite Passion, American History, and the Fathers. Pause after each for its one question. Boys can answer about the example or pass; they do not need to share a personal experience. The history question brings trust into an ordinary situation such as a test or game. Finish by practicing PRAY together: Pause, Reflect, Ask, Yield. Leave the reflection silent so no one has to report what he prayed.
Leading the Discussion
Imagine your friends leave you out of something and it bothers you all day. What could you say to God about it when you look back over your day?
When you get that restless ‘I need to be doing something else’ feeling, what do you usually reach for?
McKinley’s words were about trusting God with what he couldn’t control. Before a big test or game, what’s one thing a guy could put in God’s hands?
Brother Lawrence prayed while working in the kitchen. What’s one ordinary part of your day where you could talk to God?
Week 3 · Instructor Notes
It Seemed Good
The group decided to read the Book of Acts on their own, then come back together to discuss what they noticed, what they will carry into daily life, and how the disciples and apostles made decisions.
Leading the discussion
Begin with the chapter overview, then read the historical theological quotations.
Give everyone space to answer the first two questions before exploring the decision scenes.
For each scene, distinguish the text’s explicit claims from our interpretations.
Keep the tension in Acts 20–21 visible, and welcome disagreement without forcing a verdict.
What stood out to you as you read Acts?
What will you carry from your reading into daily life?
How did the disciples and apostles discern what to do?
The student handout and Week 3 webpage supply the passages and sources.
Week 4 · Instructor Notes
Fasting
Fasting · Consolation & desolation
What does it mean to hunger and thirst for righteousness? What happens when you stop feeding everything else?
The Lesson · The Practice & The Skill
Back to Ignatius, stuck in his bed. As he read, he noticed his insides kept shifting. When he daydreamed about his old life — glory, partying, conquest — it was exciting in the moment but left him flat and empty afterward. When he imagined giving his life to God, the joy stayed. Same man, same bed — two completely different inner trails.
The tradition gives these names. Consolation: an increase of faith, hope, and love — a settled, alive pull toward God. Desolation: the opposite — heaviness, discouragement, a sense God is far away. Tell your guys plainly: desolation is normal. It doesn’t mean something is wrong with them, or that God left. Fasting makes these movements loud, so you can learn to read them.
A word of care: with teenagers, be wise about food fasting. For some it’s good practice; for athletes, or anyone with any history around food, a screen, game, or habit fast is the far better call. Default to those unless you know the young man and his family are fully on board.
For Your Life Today
At this age the wanting gets loud — food, phones, games, attention, and yes, sexual desire. The lie underneath all of it is, ‘I have to obey every craving the second I feel it.’ Fasting disproves that lie in the most direct way possible: you feel the want, you don’t act, and you don’t die. You’re bigger than your cravings.
That’s one of the most freeing things a young man can learn. Keep the fast doable and lean toward screens and habits over food. And keep returning to the language of consolation and desolation — it gives them a map for an interior life they’ve never had words for.
Why This Verse · Ezra 8:21
Documented — it was the sermon text
Before the Pilgrims sailed, their pastor John Robinson proclaimed ‘a day of solemn humiliation’ and preached from Ezra 8:21 — Ezra proclaiming a fast at the river Ahava before leading the exiles home on a dangerous road. Robinson chose it because he read his own congregation as a remnant making the same journey.
One honest caveat: the author says Robinson’s text ‘apparently’ ran through verse 23. The hedge is about how many verses he covered, not about the text itself.
Leading the Discussion
What’s one craving that feels like it runs you — that you obey the second you feel it?
Most things you really want never actually satisfy you. Why do you think that is?
When have you done something ‘fun’ that left you emptier afterward, like Ignatius’s daydreams?
What’s one thing you could fast from for a few days — and what might that teach you?
Week 5 · Instructor Notes
Generosity
Generosity · Gratitude
What does it mean to be merciful? What will you open your hands and let go of?
The Lesson · The Practice & The Skill
Generosity is living with open hands instead of clenched ones — with your money, your stuff, your time, and your mercy toward people. And it grows straight out of gratitude. There’s real research that gratitude physically changes the brain; people who regularly notice what they’ve been given become lighter, more generous, less anxious.
The world runs on a story of scarcity — there’s never enough, so grab and hold. That story makes you clench. Gratitude tells the opposite story: you’ve been given so much — which lets you open your hands.
Generosity is a muscle. You can’t wait until you ‘have enough’ to start, because that day never comes — the scarcity story makes sure of it. You start small, and you start now. And keep mercy in view: generosity aimed at people — forgiving a debt instead of collecting it, helping someone who can’t pay you back.
For Your Life Today
Your guys are forming their relationship with money and stuff right now, and it will stick. The culture’s plan is simple: want more, buy more, post it, feel briefly great, want more. A generous person breaks the loop.
Keep generosity broad — money, time, credit, and mercy — so the guys without money aren’t left out. Tie it back to the gratitude step from the Examen: noticing what you’ve been given is the same muscle, grown bigger. A gratitude list always starts slow and then breaks open — let them push through it.
Why This Verse · Matthew 6:33
Documented — Wanamaker quoted it as his operating principle
Asked how he found time to run a four-thousand-scholar Sunday school on top of the stores and the Post Office, Wanamaker answered instantly: ‘Why, the Sunday School is my business! All other things are just things. Forty-five years ago I decided that God’s promise was sure: “Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.”’
He is naming the verse as the decision that ordered everything else — which is exactly what this week asks of them.
Leading the Discussion
What makes it hard to be generous — to give money, time, or credit away?
When has someone shown you mercy — gone easy on you when they didn’t have to?
Scarcity says ‘never enough’; gratitude says ‘look how much I’ve been given.’ Which runs your head most days?
Who in your life needs mercy from you right now?
Week 6 · Instructor Notes
Silence & Solitude
Silence & Solitude · Stillness & the breath
What does it mean to be pure in heart — undivided? What will you hear when you go quiet?
The Lesson · The Practice & The Skill
When you actually get quiet, the first thing you discover is that you’re not quiet at all — your head is loud. Picture a mountain. The weather on it changes constantly: sun, then in ten minutes a dangerous storm. Here’s the thing — you are not the weather. You are the mountain.
When you get silent, ‘weather’ rolls in: random thoughts, that text you forgot, the thing you’re embarrassed about. The trap is thinking you are all that chatter. But because Christ lives in you, you have the sturdiness of a mountain. The thoughts are real, but they’re just weather. They pass. The skill isn’t clearing your mind (impossible) or arguing with every thought (exhausting). It’s: notice it, don’t chase it, and come back.
This week’s practice is two minutes of silence with the breath. Belly breathing — hand on your stomach, slow in through the nose, slow out — calms the body and helps you settle. Every distracting thought is just another rep: another chance to bring your attention back to the loving presence of God.
For Your Life Today
Be straight with them: the phone is designed never to let them be bored, because boredom is bad for business. Learning to be still is, quietly, an act of rebellion — most people their age literally cannot do it. You’re teaching a rare thing.
On purity: in a culture saturated with images that train boys to consume people, the deepest formation isn’t a rule — it’s teaching a young man that his attention is his own, and that it can rest. A single, settled heart is what eventually lets him see clearly: himself, other people, and God. Do not skip the actual two minutes of silence together — the discomfort is the lesson.
Why This Verse · Genesis 1:1
Documented — the crew read it aloud from lunar orbit
On the Christmas Eve broadcast Borman said, ‘for all the people back on earth, the crew of Apollo 8 has a message we would like to send to you’ — then the three men passed around a fireproof copy of Genesis 1, taken from a Gideon Bible, and read verses 1 through 10 in turn. An estimated one billion people in sixty-four countries heard it. Nobody at Mission Control knew in advance what they would say.
Leading the Discussion
What in your life is designed so you’re never bored or quiet? What is that doing to you?
What does it mean for your heart to be ‘split’ in a lot of directions instead of single?
When you got quiet this week, what ‘weather’ rolled in?
Where could you put two minutes of real silence into a normal day?
Week 7 · Instructor Notes
Community
Community · Doing this together
What does it mean to make peace instead of just keeping it? Who do you need to talk to this week?
The Lesson · The Practice & The Skill
None of this was ever meant to be done alone. The men who first taught this material admitted they were uneasy about anyone practicing it solo — because for two thousand years, this way of life was lived together, in community, never as a private self-improvement app.
That’s the difference between an app and an operating system. An app is something you open for a quick ‘spiritual vibe’ and close. An operating system runs underneath your whole life. Real brotherhood is the operating system — and it’s rare. Most guys have plenty of acquaintances (people they game with, joke with, stand next to) and almost no one who actually knows them. A brother is someone who knows the real you and stays.
And real community isn’t a group with no conflict — it’s a group that knows how to make peace. When conflict hits, guys usually blow up or go cold and ghost. There’s a third way: actually address it, own your part, and repair. Almost no one teaches a young man that, and it will matter for the rest of his life.
For Your Life Today
Be honest with them about how guys ‘do’ friendship — mostly side by side, doing stuff, rarely face to face about anything real. That’s fine, but it isn’t enough. This may be the most powerful session of the course.
If you run a ‘be known’ exercise — each guy answering, for real, ‘what’s something going on that most people don’t know?’ — protect it fiercely with a no-fixing, no-roasting rule, and be ready to follow up one-on-one afterward. Model it yourself, first, with something real but appropriate.
Why This Verse · Matthew 5:9
The author’s application — NOT Rush’s own citation
Be straight with the boys about this one. Nothing in the record has Benjamin Rush quoting Matthew 5:9. Writing to Adams in February 1812, he rejoiced in the restored correspondence — ‘I consider you and him as the North and South poles of the American Revolution’ — but he never reached for the Beatitude. The book supplies it: ‘Dr. Rush was elated, having fulfilled the words of Jesus.’
The story is true and the fit is real; the verse is the author’s reading of it. Of the ten weeks, this is the one pairing that is interpretation rather than record — and saying so out loud is worth more to these guys than smoothing it over. It teaches them to ask where a claim comes from.
Leading the Discussion
Whose life do you find yourself comparing yourself to — and what does it do to you?
Can you actually be glad when someone you compete with wins? Why is that so hard?
Who actually knows the real you? How many people is that?
Is there a low-grade conflict you could take one step to repair this week?
Week 8 · Instructor Notes
Service & Witness
Service & Witness · Joining what God is doing
What does it mean to be blessed when doing right costs you? Where will you serve when no one is watching?
The Lesson · The Practice & The Skill
All this inner work has an outer point. When Jesus met a blind man named Bartimaeus, he didn’t barge in with his own agenda — he asked, ‘What do you want me to do for you?’ He met the man right where the man himself knew he needed help. That’s the model for service: not swooping in to fix people from above, but paying attention to what’s actually needed and joining in.
And here’s the claim the whole course has been building toward: God is already out there, spilling his love into the world — into schools, teams, lunch tables. All the noticing you’ve practiced on your own heart is what gives you eyes to see where God is at work around you, so you can join him there.
Witness — actually living and standing for Jesus — sometimes costs you. You’ll get mocked, left out, called weird. Jesus is blunt: that will happen, and it’s not a sign you’re doing it wrong. Two kinds of courage this week: the courage to serve (especially in secret, for someone who can’t repay you) and the courage to stand.
For Your Life Today
Two kinds of courage are rare in a teenager: the courage to serve — to do the unglamorous, un-posted thing for someone who can’t repay him — and the courage to stand, to not hide his faith just because it’s socially expensive. Both get noticed. Both are far easier with brothers doing it alongside him.
Push hard on hidden service; it’s the antidote to performative faith, which teens rightly hate. And keep ‘persecution’ proportional — you’re talking about being mocked or left out, not martyrdom — and don’t let anyone turn it into a victim complex. The aim is courage, not a chip on the shoulder.
Why This Verse · John 15:13
Documented — applied at the national memorial by a president
On February 3, 1951 — eight years to the day after the Dorchester went down — Truman dedicated the Chapel of the Four Chaplains in Philadelphia: ‘They really lived up to the moral standard that declares, “Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.”’
The scene itself comes from survivors under oath: Grady Clark saw the four of them praying as the bow rose; James Eardley, the last man known to see them alive, watched them climb onto the keel and stand arm in arm.
Leading the Discussion
When something feels pointless or hopeless, what happens to your willingness to do hard or good things?
What’s something you believe that’s socially expensive to admit? What makes it scary?
Where do you already see someone around you hurting or in need?
What’s one act of service you could do this week that nobody finds out about?
Week 9 · Instructor Notes
Scripture
Scripture · Meditating on the Word
What does it mean to love God with everything, and your neighbor as yourself? What one line will you carry all week?
The Lesson · The Practice & The Skill
There’s a difference between reading the Bible to get through it and chewing on it until it does something to you. A young soldier named Ignatius once spent ten months stuck in bed after a cannonball shattered his leg, with nothing to read but a life of Christ and a book of saints. He didn’t speed-read. He marinated — and those words slowly rebuilt him from the inside.
That’s the skill: lectio divina, ‘sacred reading.’ Read a short passage slowly, out loud. Reflect — read it again; which word or phrase snags you? Sit there. Respond — tell God why it stuck. Rest — read it once more and be quiet with it.
The text we use is the one Jesus said the entire Bible hangs on. When a man tried to test him — ‘which command is the greatest?’ — Jesus didn’t pick a single rule. He summed up all of Scripture in love: love God with everything you’ve got, and love your neighbor as yourself. So feeding on the Word was never about collecting facts — it’s about being slowly formed into love. You are always being fed something about what to want and who’s winning. What you marinate in is what you turn into — so marinate in this.
For Your Life Today
Your guys are fed all day. Every scroll feeds the brain something about what matters, what to want, who’s ahead — most of it engineered to make them feel they don’t have enough and aren’t enough. Scripture is choosing, on purpose, to feed the mind something true — and the truest, weightiest thing in all of it is also the simplest: love God, love people.
Resist the urge to over-explain. The whole point of lectio is letting the text work on them, not extracting the ‘right answer.’ And name the modern face of vainglory plainly: the performance, the metrics, the audience in their pocket. The Great Commandment is its undoing — you cannot really love God and your neighbor and keep performing for a crowd at the same time.
Why This Verse · Philippians 2:16
Partly the author’s attribution — worth flagging
President Wilson wrote the foreword, dated July 12, 1917, for the pocket Bibles issued to American soldiers, and gave the book a title: ‘The Bible is the word of life. I beg that you will read it and find this out for yourselves.’ The author traces that title to Philippians 2:16. Wilson himself cited no chapter and verse, and the same phrase appears in 1 John 1:1 — so the specific verse is the author’s attribution.
What is not in doubt is the fact the week rests on: nine million copies in eighty languages, and men found dead at the Somme with the New Testament open in their hands.
Leading the Discussion
What do you do differently when you know people are watching versus when you’re alone?
Jesus says the whole Bible hangs on two things — loving God and loving people. Why do you think he sums all of it up in love?
What are you ‘feeding your mind’ the most right now? What is it making you want?
Which is harder for you right now — loving God with everything, or loving the people right around you? Why?
Week 10 · Instructor Notes
Integration
A Rule of Life · Spiritual location
What does it mean to be salt and light? Who are you becoming — and what will you actually keep?
The Lesson · The Practice & The Skill
Ten weeks in, the danger is that all of this fades back into ‘that thing we did.’ This week is about making it stick. Start with an honest spiritual location: bring back Jesus’ question to Bartimaeus — ‘What do you want me to do for you?’ — and let each young man point to a real place in his life and say, ‘God, here.’
Then build a Rule of Life — your ‘operating system.’ Not an app you open for a spiritual vibe, but the thing running quietly underneath your whole life. Keep it small enough that you’ll actually keep it: one daily practice, one weekly practice, and one way to stay in community.
And then the send-off. Jesus says: you are salt, you are light — and salt in the shaker and a lamp under a bowl are useless. You weren’t formed for ten weeks to hide it. The real question under all of it is not ‘what will I do?’ but ‘who am I becoming?’ — because the wax always takes some shape. This is choosing the seal.
For Your Life Today
‘Who am I becoming?’ is the real question under all ten weeks. A young man becomes someone whether he chooses it or not, shaped by whatever he marinates in. A Rule of Life is simply choosing, on purpose, who he wants to become, and putting a few practices in place to get there.
Keep the Rules small — the number-one failure is an ambitious plan dropped in a week. One daily, one weekly, one community: that’s plenty. Then mark the end of the ten weeks with a real celebration, and speak a genuine word over each young man about what you’ve watched grow in him. This is a rite worth marking.
Why This Verse · Matthew 5:14
Documented — Winthrop borrowed it deliberately
‘A Model of Christian Charity’ builds to the line itself: ‘For we must consider that we shall be a City upon a Hill. The eyes of all people are upon us’ — Matthew 5:14 applied to the colony on purpose.
Two things to press. First, what the sermon actually demands is relational, not national: ‘we must be knit together in this work as one man… we must delight in each other; make others’ conditions our own; rejoice together, mourn together, labor and suffer together.’ That is this course’s whole goal in Winthrop’s words. Second, the author’s own caveat: Jesus coined the phrase for his followers, his church — not for a country. Presidents have quoted the line for four hundred years with the sermon stripped away.
Leading the Discussion
Looking back over the eight passions, which one is most at work in you right now?
Which Beatitude do you most want to be true of you a year from now?
Compared to week one, what’s actually different about how you see your life now?
If Jesus asked you, ‘What do you want me to do for you?’ — what would you say today?